“OPEN THE DOOR IT’S THE POLICE”
who is it?
what is a police
*cops start whispering*
“how does he not know what a police is”
A lot of birthdays in November. It’s as if there’s some kind of romantic peak in or around mid-February.
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Parents are like “You left a gently used paper towel in your room over christmas. Do you need that? Want me to mail it?”
Took my 3 year old to a lot of historic sites and whale watching today. Asked what her favourite part was and she said, “The M&M’s”.
I hate when I forget to shave then people assume I’m a hippy and start talking about recycling.
That tattoo of wings on your back are good. But wings that small could hardly get you off the ground though. *reveals full body wing tattoo*
⭐️ LATEST SKETCH: The Met Police Investigate.
🎥 FULL SKETCH HERE:
ok, now say it again so my wife hears
“you’re too big for this ride, sir”
The closest I’ve ever come to winning anything was that time I got picked from a lineup at the station.
A werewolf is chasing you and you are going to die but he’s wearing TOMS and you can’t stop laughing.
“oh no, this is so scary or whatever lol”
-giraffe in quicksand