Prank Idea For The Ladies:
Swallow a plastic dinosaur, then make an appointment to get an ultrasound.
Anyone else ever wondered how long it would take a giraffe to throw up ?
You Might Also Like
I’m like a fuckin’ origami expert when I’m down to the last sheet of toilet paper.
If O is to Orange, and / is to Division, then Ø is to Fruit Ninja.
The 1st cup was used in 1874, the 1st helmet was used in 1974. It only took 100 years to learn our brain is also important.
Be thankful for Twitter. The way gas prices are headed, we’re never going to meet real people ever again.
We wouldn’t really have any national debt in this country if strippers would just pay their damn income taxes.
Why do people assume I know all about computers just because I’m from India? That makes so I angry I just want to 01010010101010101010101
I don’t know why they invite me to an Easter egg hunt, then freak out when I turn up in camo gear with my rifle.
People who don’t follow you but comment on tweets with ridiculously stupid opinions are just hecklers with all the charm of a pedophile.
I would love my job so much more if I didn’t have to hide my flask.