Haters gonna hate. And hater stabbers gonna hater stab.
Caller ID isn’t enough for Me I need to know why you’re calling.
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cost of the ice cream my kid threw a tantrum in the grocery store to get: $5
the look on his face when I ate it for dinner: priceless
Is running in front of cars some sort of gang initiation for squirrels?
If Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader then she would be known as Ella Vader…….
rroses are red,
violets are blue,
Valentine’s Day was invented by big corporations so they could sell more anti-depressants
Maybe Aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.
If you see a porcupine in your yard, that’s my cat and we’re not done with our accupuncture session.
I just opened a Capri Sun in the dark, sup ladies
My name is Leon but some of you know me by my street name, 9th avenue.
I just wrote that it has already been an exceptionally long eeek and I don’t even feel the need to correct it.