Did you know that nuns have to eat a banana with a knife and fork?
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[Last supper]
*breaks bread* This is my body
*pours wine* This is my blood
*plays Montell Jordan* THIS IS HOW WE DO IT
*Apostles go nuts*
Saturday
Pac Man is my favourite video game about my life.
It keeps getting harder and I can’t stop eating everything in sight.
I texted my husband and reminded him that you guys told me a couple of weeks ago that it doesn’t take 6 hours to play 18 holes of golf.
His response, “You can’t believe everything you read on the Internet.”
Wrong Way Do Not Enter seems like a weird name for a street.
My (32F) husband (36M) wants to start a ‘restaurant for magicians’, and it is tearing our family apart
Me: What do you want to be when you grow up?
2-year-old: An eagle!
I’m going to save so much money on college.
My body is a temple, but it’s one of those temples in Thailand where they let monkeys shit all over the place
Him: When I suggested we try a little role play, this is not what I had in mind
Me: [in Jabba the Hutt costume] JUST PUT ON THE GOLD BIKINI
This sounds more like an accusation than a question.
