@TopherKearby

Donald be careful.
Donald watch out.
Donald look both ways.
Donald Duck!

You Might Also Like

@1KelliBelle

Me: promise you won’t show anyone?

Him: promise

*sends pics

H: that’s pics of fruit snacks

M: you said you wanted pics of my goods

@DVSblast

A tragic kissout between police and suspects leaves over 15 innocent bystanders believing in love again

@TylerLinkin

In a parallel universe, one sock goes in the washer/dryer and two come out.

@samalmightysam

Breaking: CNN confirms planes need fuel to fly. In other news, scientist confirm brains are not needed to work at CNN.

@HenpeckedHal

Little kids are like sponges: always damp, little bits of food stuck all over them, faint smell of mildew…

@primawesome

I pet my dog and he didn’t wag his tail. Is he seeing someone else? Is the magic gone? Do we need to spice things up? I’ll dress like a cat.

@badbanana

Idea: Like Google Glass, but a necklace or something that projects a website onto the face of the person talking to you.

@causticbob

All these Email scams must make it hard for Legitimate Nigerian Royalty to share large sums of cash with strangers!

@aliterative

If you love someone, let them go. If they don’t come back, detonate the explosive collar.

@Nickadoo

I’m less upset with Lance Armstrong lying about taking performance-enchancing drugs than I am at Oprah for lying about retiring.