even if u realy hate sombody, u shoud never insult their physical apearance!!! bc as soon as u dig deeper u will find much stronger insults
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Like dudes straight up do not pay attention. It took Bruce Willis 2 hours and 10 minutes to realize he was a damn ghost in the Sixth Sense.
[before cones were invented]
*fistful of ice cream* there has to be a better way
Me: Sorry I called out the wrong name just now
Woman: Okay but still, what the hell
Bloody Mary: Oh gross, am I in a ceiling mirror
Me: *throwing random stick outside* Damn kids.
[LATER]
Husband: Where’d my stick go?
You can’t have your cake and thigh gap too.
If you’re wondering what all these scratches on my chest are from, it’s because my cat hates to get in the hot tub with me.
I save a lot of money on all my tooth extractions by engaging in street fights..
Him: Can I have your number?
Me: *looks up from texting
I don’t have a phone.
For sale: baby shoes. tried to wear them. didn’t realise they were for a baby.
[colonizing Mars]
M:a:r:s