@audipenny

I am dressed in all grey and a man also dressed in all grey just stared at me and for a second I got very nervous that he thought I was him

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@Marlebean

I tried to kill a bug with febreeze but it didn’t work and now the room smells like lilac and fear.

@ThisOneSayz

My husband pissed me off today, so I hid his keys by putting them in the spot where we keep our keys.

@bridger_w

Friday night. Gonna put on my dancing shoes, throw on my coolest shirt, and aimlessly browse Netflix for an hour

@iwearaonesie

If you start smacking people with your wife’s purse she won’t ask you to hold it for her anymore