I didn’t come here to be called names
You Might Also Like
I just stabbed a pin in my arm.
Somewhere out there a bunch of voodoo dolls just said ‘Ouch.’
*hires sky writer*
I K N O W Y O U A T E
T H E L A S T F R U I T R O L L U P.
I W A N T A D I V O R C E
K A R E N.
The guy at the gym said rest days are really important, so I’ve been resting for 6 years.
My kids have been helping our neighbors in their garden and now I’m having Children of the Corn flashbacks.
Millennial: Pics or it didn’t happen
Great Grandfather: World War II is well documented Ryan
It’s kinda like i’m a shopaholic but with alcohol instead of clothes.
My dog really needs to learn how to drive a stick
because what good is fetching one bottle of vodka.
WARNING: I WILL NOT STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND BUT I MIGHT STEAL YOUR CAT
Is it still a walk of shame if I’m leaving my own house?
It ain’t like I’m proud of what happened in there.
“You ruined everything.”
-People exaggerating when you only ruined like one or two things, tops