@AaronFullerton Beyoncé: Ok now ladies let’s get in formation.
Ladies: Information about what?
Beyoncé: Dammit, ladies, we went over this.
@SadPeruna If da Vinci were alive today, the “Mona Lisa” would have been called “IMG-20121020-00463.jpg”
You Might Also Like
@AaronFullerton 
@robdelaney My “my wife is not having an affair with her karate teacher” headline is raising a lot of questions already answered by my headline.
@Brampersandon_ [Cute Girl]: *in hot tub* Hey baby. Why don’t you come join me?
[Lobster]: No I’m good over here. That’s how my dad died.
@JJSummertime You guys realize St. Valentine was beheaded, right?
@iRowlf Prank Idea: Toss some red laundry in the ocean and turn the great white sharks into the great pink sharks.
@IamJackBoot I have no sympathy for people who leave their car doors unlocked then complain when they find me sleeping in the backseat.
@ApocalypticLoFi Why do we “shush” our dogs when they bark at the postman when 98% of our mail is bills?
Dogs get it.
Next time, join in.
@SomeChrisTweets Why was six afraid of seven? Generations of institutionalized bigotry.
@justincousson “I know you! You were one of the bad guys in Titanic!” I yelled at the ocean, who ignored me like most celebrities.
@nairamk Ice Bucket Challenge Champion since 1945 ☺️
