Just saw a dude catcall a woman with “Nice heels, girl” and his friend slapped him and said “Those are knock offs, bro”

You Might Also Like


Sometimes it’s not about missing someone, it’s about reloading and trying again.


everyone i ever dated is impressed when i namedrop foreign authors but never bothers to check if they’re just ikea product names (they are)


the song “pour some sugar on me” was written about shredded wheat cereal and i won’t be taking any discussion on this.


Kid 1: Why’d u call me Aphrodite?
Me: After the Greek goddess of love
Kid 2: What about me?
Me: Well Alvin, ur named after a famous chipmunk


[sees wife getting changed after work] you should leave them high heels on
“ohhh yeah?”
[thinking about the spider on the bathroom ceiling] yeah


Snake: What do you do?
Gun shop owner: I’m an arms dealer.
*snake gets super excited*


Hollywood’s obsession with hacking scenes in movies made me woefully overestimate how many elevators I’d have to “hack” as a programmer


Commercials for prescription drugs would be better if the actors had to act out the side effects too.