@SteveSuckington LOIS LANE: here i got you these contacts so you don’t have to wear glasses anymore
CLARK KENT: *nervous sweating*
@jwblvd MAGICIAN: Think of a number, any number.
ME: *thinks for a bit* …k
MAGICIAN: That is a letter.
ME: omg ur right
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@SteveSuckington 
@LuckoftheDraw86 Yogi Bear: You gonna eat that?
Hiker: THAT’S A BABY.
YB: And I’m a talking bear.
Hiker:
YB:
Hiker:
YB: So where are we on that baby?
@Dawn_M_ I’d make an excellent cavewoman because I can finger paint and light fires.
@Tbone7219 My friend has canceled our lunch plans three days in a row. I’m starting to think she really doesn’t like lunch.
@stevevsninjas – Dracula darling, you have something stuck in your teeth.
– Vhere, here?
– No…
– Here?
– No, just go look in-
– GO LOOK IN WHAT, SARAH?
@Reverend_Scott Iron Man: I’ll hack into their security.
Hulk: HULK SMASH DOOR!
Thor: I’ll silence their guards.
Captain America: What’s a microwave?
@mrtruthandsoul I can tell the way my kids inherited my sarcasm by the way I want to punch them in the face every time they use it.
@mkat816 Did you try turning your relationship off and then back on again?
@lmegordon Toddler mom: please take a second bite of chicken
Tween mom: please do not eat an entire second chicken
@anerdonfire2 As we debated who would win between Vader and Gandalf, we suddenly realized our dates had left