me: if ur soulmate dies before u meet them do u get like a backup soulmate
professor: i meant questions about the midterm
You Might Also Like
Time traveling humans are always freaked out by culture changes
If a moose time travels it probably just finds a field to frolic in moosily
Hold on I’m about to count my money. Alright I’m done.
The bad news is we need to downsize on people named Jeremy, so you’re fired.
WHAT WAS THE GOOD NEWS?
India’s tiger population is up 30%!
Based on the number of AVI pics taken in your cars, I’m guessing that quite a few of you girls are on the run
Twitter is where you ask an actual question for help & get nothing but stars yet you tell a joke with a question mark & everybody answers.
me: this house is making lots of creaky sounds
realtor: that just means it’s settling
my fiancee: *creaky sounds*
I asked what I could bring for Thanksgiving this year and my mom said it was up to me so I’m bringing a wireless router.
David Attenborough: The faster antelope species always keep their slower cousins, the cantaloupe, nearby to throw under the feet of predators to trip them thus creating a hilarious pile up on the savannah.
Me: I’ll cook
Fire department arriving 7mins later: Jesus Christ, again?