Recipe idea: Add ADDITIONAL cheese to your frozen pizza to make pizza with EXTRA CHEESE! (Ladies, you may pin this on your pinny web thing.)
I like the show on fox news where there are 4 conservative idiots yelling at one liberal idiot.
By the power vested in me by my credit card, I now pronounce you my new fluffy hat. You may now hug my head.
I almost wish the guy I’m stalking would find me and call the cops. These bushes are scratchy and my legs are cramping.
If you say “I don’t feel good” and a pregnant woman says “Me neither,” DO NOT respond with “Yeah, but you chose this for yourself…”
Today i started stalking guys. Not for any gay reason but it’s so much easier to do. Women always complain, guys don’t suspect a thing.
I am starving and horny. This cucumber is going in me one way or another.
Like you’ve never thought about giving Adderall to a turtle.
My kids are giving all the people on this plane a hard lesson in birth control right now.
They named it Galaxy Note because when you take this thing out of your pocket, the entire Galaxy can note that it’s been taken out.