@KyleMcDowell86 *puts a picture of Roger Rabbit in a picture frame*
I did it. I framed Roger Rabbit.
@byjoelanderson “See, you’ve clearly never had good mashed potatoes. You’ve got to add butter, salt, garlic, $300 of bitcoin, gravy, a crab leg dipped in butter sauce, chives, tickets to a Rams game, and a light sprinkling of parmesan and then you’ll understand how amazing they are.”
@danisbadatthis Why did the man with no hands go to the doctor?
Because he didn’t feel well.
@Playing_Dad Does racism still exist? Let’s go to this panel of white people to find out.
@ACartoonCat *being broken up with*
Me: I thought we were on the same page!
Her: We are! It’s just the page of the dictionary that has “awesome” and “awful” on it
@UncleDuke1969 “I don’t know why you don’t just leave him, Elaine.”
@DrunjAF Only God can judge me.
*gets hit by lightning*
@MiddlingMs You know that kid on the field who’s too busy spinning in circles to notice the ball coming at him? He’s mine, and he’s not even on a team.
@Theropologist You know how when everyone is clapping along to the song and you join in and it’s fun at first but after a while you’re like oh shit do I have to keep this up for the whole song? That’s what life is like.
@fatherofcomedy I threw caution to the wind.caution is my little brother.
@geekysteven “Why didn’t any of you go back and kill Hitler?”
TIME TRAVELER: We prioritized stopping Zortho the Endless Scourge in 1935.
“Who?”
TT: Bingo