I’ve never seen a chameleon. Good job, chameleons.
Shout out to my drug dealer Jamal, he’s taught me more about the metric system than any of my teachers ever did.
You Might Also Like
Pretty sure that “Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory” is the kid’s version of “Saw”.
Other kids wanted to be astronauts or doctors, when I was little I wanted to be a horse calendar
I began writing full time 20 years ago. I’ve sold lots – my tv, my car, my jewellery…
COPS: COME OUT OF THE HOUSE
“I’LL NEVER COME OUT”
COPS: WE WERE TALKING TO YOUR DOG. WE WANT TO PET HIM
This dog is a visual representation of my phone distracting me from work
There are two rules in life:
1. Never tell anyone everything.
In grade 5 during biology my teacher asked me “what is in cells?”
I answered my Uncle Eric and Dad and she made me go home.
I’m all “class”.
The first two letters really aren’t necessary.
*writes “Place sacrifice here” on baby changing station in Wal-Mart bathroom*