Sorry, I’m in a hurry, lets talk while we walk… You go that way.

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hey ther delilah wats it like in gotham city
is the joker stil in jail–
i mean yes babe u look so prety yes u do
batman is not a cool as u


This meeting could have been an email. That email could have been a fistfight in the alley


Crazy to think back before camera phones we all used to sit in front of bathroom mirrors with sketch pads.


I’m about two tissues away from shoving a tampon up my nose.


Prove you’re not a robot by typing two words that sounds like they were doodled on a toilet cubicle by a schizophrenic


“Expecto me to be there”

Harry Potter RSVPing to a party


*Attempts to use ‘I have a boyfriend’ meme*

Meme: I have a boyfriend.


*walks into alma mater carrying English degree*

I’d like a refund, please. This did not work as promised.



Disease for $500 Alex

“Dysentery, Typhoid, Bubonic Plague, Dengue Fever”

What’s better than catching a man cold?