Staying with my parents, pt. 17:
Me: Mom, one of your wigs is set up in your bathtub in such a way that it looks like a person is sitting in there. It’s terrifying.
Mom: …
Me. …you did that on purpose, didn’t you?
Mom: It scares your dad. He’s funny when he’s scared.
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“Excellent. How about a weakness?”
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Me: Eat, wait to eat, eat, wait to eat, eat
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Me: Right? So is there an anti-waiting pill, or
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oh no that guy hated dying
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*deletes your contact information*
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