@ehdannyboy

Still my favourite meme.

You Might Also Like

@RdrJay47

Her: Are you getting off early today?

Me: THAT HAPPENED ONE TIME!

@Westoff123

I’m going to buy a house near the St. Louis Airport and paint “Welcome to chicago” on my roof to confuse people who are about to land.

@ExcuseMyTweets

The Bank of America app randomly disappeared off my phone and now I’m wondering how much money I spent last night.

@DennisFarrell

Imagine being held at gunpoint (bear with me) by a literate animal, and the only hope of rescue is (BEAR WITH ME) tweeting a coded message

@bridger_w

This burned out sign has given me the permission I need to take care of my neighborhood grocer once and for all

@EndhooS

Fireman: Is anyone else inside the house?

Me: Uh yes..my son is trapped in my room he- [fireman charges into blaze] ..HE LOOKS LIKE AN XBOX

@pleatedjeans

doctor: here’s your x-ray
me: ew I look ugly in this one delete it take another

@Anniewritess

How have I got to this age and I still haven’t figured out what you’re supposed to do with your arms when you’re trying to get to sleep.

@reallifemommy3

6: I like your necklace

Me: Thank you

6: When you die me and my sisters get your jewelry, right

Me: Not if I disown you first