@SassyChantelle
@KimmyMonte It’s bikini season, so you’re allowed to shoot bikinis as long as you have a permit.
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@KimmyMonte 
@robdelaney “A mean dog is terrorizing people a few towns over. I am going to drive over there & yell at him from my car.” – Barack Obama
@Spaziotwat Deodorant? I’ve never needed to buy any. People just give it me. Complete strangers sometimes
@KalvinMacleod ME: I’ve been shot
MEDIC: put pressure on the wound
ME: ok, wound, are you saving for your child’s tuition because education is important
@CrockettForReal As a man with a beard, I can tell you, when you get sauce in there you just rub it in. It’s part of the beard now
@Sanbel11 I just want to put my hair in a cute little messy bun and not look like a sumo wrestler.
@MELisCrazyInAZ 1993: thrown from bike headfirst, rides 12 more miles and doesn’t head home till dark
2022: owww, I think I sprained my hand turning on my turn signal
@junejuly12 *plans eclipse viewing party*
*buys special glasses*
*gets plenty of snacks and drinks**wakes up to pouring rain*
*goes back to sleep*
@Ideal_Victoria I’m still waiting for my date from last summer to come back from the restaurant’s bathroom…
I hope everything is ok.
@Ndeshi_M I’m quitting modelling, I need more job security so I’m going to become a princess.