@LizHackett
@Jake_Vig “Remember six seconds ago when you were comfortable?”
– oscillating fans
You Might Also Like
@Jake_Vig 
@dilemmalord this tumblr post deserves to be put in history textbooks
@tyiepo Everyone was texting her good morning sunshine, so I texted her “good morning solar eclipse”
Yeah, don’t do that.
@AtticusKiddo I love Kit Kats the most whenever there aren’t three other people around.
@My_Higherness Educated Twitter about to come and differentiate for us between an earthquake and tremor.
We don’t care…as long as there is shaking.
@RS3Feed I like to go to death metal shows and throw throat lozenges on the stage, it shows I care.
@stephenjmolloy Doctor: “The CAT scan results are in and they have confirmed my suspicions.”
Me: “Okay, I’m ready.”
Doctor: “You’re not a cat.”
@zacharyflynn Worried that one day pillows will take over and start making forts out of us.
@grammar_cunt “I love you” can be the most beautiful words you can hear from someone you truly care about, next to “I got this round.”
@texasstalkermom That awkward moment you run into someone in public that you know, and there is nowhere to hide.