@DevilryFun
@WilliamAder Someone tweeted today that they were “29-ish” and I didn’t know you could “ish” 15 years.
You Might Also Like
@WilliamAder 
@Jazzzzzmina After watching Honey Boo Boo, I realize America has much bigger problems than the national debt.
@AaronFullerton Reading about how much Daniel Craig hates Bond is like The Pope Visiting Kim Davis all over again.
@Lance_Said_This Thank you for calling our automated help line. To save time, please answer these 8 questions about your account that our live agent will then re-ask you if I ever eventually connect you to them.
@archeohistories Some Things Never Change 😀
#archaeohistories
@Cpin42 Got fired by the DMV for giving Stuart Little his driver’s license
@deloisivete Can’t leave this facebook group because someone has raccoons living under their bathtub and now I’m invested in how it plays out
@FunnyBison *family reunion*
– flirting shouldn’t be this easy
@SeanLowe09 I just heated up a delicious chocolate brownie and put some ice cream on top of it & sat on the couch to enjoy it.
Seconds later, Catherine asked Samuel if he’d like a bite on MY brownie.
I faked a smile and gave him a bite.
Soon after, she asked him AGAIN.
I have no wife.
@Brianhopecomedy They must have had a really good laugh when doctors realized that thermometers could be taken orally too.