My work day –
8:00-11:30 – wonder what I’ll eat for lunch today
11:30 – 12:00 – eat lunch
12:00 – 4:30 – Damn lunch was good.
Three things that are certain in life~
2) Paying taxes
3) Somewhere a woman is pissed at a man ….
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I don’t think this bowl of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups on my desk is making me as indispensable to the workplace as I had hoped.
“Don’t put it on my plate if you don’t want me to eat it!”
– me to my kid, who’s crying because I ate the playdoh burger he put on my plate
I don’t care what kinda lighter you have, its fair game if its unattended. Unless its engraved, then I’ll give it back for Christmas.
*training the dog to sit*
Me: So you’re already low to the ground, but you must get lower.
This total stranger wanted to have a spontaneous tickle fight on the street and…oh…nope, never mind I’m being robbed. Guys I’m being rob
Logic says the screw I dropped should be somewhere by my feet, but science says it’s under the couch in the other room.
I don’t believe in astrology but I’m pretty sure the planet controlling your life is Earth.
Animals that lose their tails visit the retail store.
After years of beta testing, my body is ready to launch OS X Cougar.