What idiot called it the road to Bethlehem instead of the highway to the manger zone?
Writing cuss words on the white space of textbook pages is marginally offensive.
Me: At last I will feel oblivion’s sweet embrace.
Tsunami (inexplicably reversing): I have a boyfriend.
It’s okay if you didn’t notice that I switched my beard trimmer’s setting from 6 to 5. The difference is stubble.
Minnesota is my favorite state that sounds like it’s a small soft drink.