My life would be so much easier if it wasn’t for that thing…God, what is that thing called…other people.
Sometimes the only reason I leave my house is so when someone asks about my day I don’t have to say “Netflix and avoiding responsibilities”
In first grade when I’d tell my parents what I learned in class and they’d act amazed, I’d think “Shouldn’t you know this shit already?”
The saddest thing about the digital age is the next generation won’t have that “nudie mag they found in the woods” experience. #culture
Every time I talk to a fancy journalist and they ask what I do in my free time my scumbag brain goes “say masturbate, it’ll be hilarious”