If I had laser hair I would never get that shit removed.
I recycle jokes because I care about the environment, Samantha.
Honestly people shouldn’t even be allowed to talk until they’re like 35 years old.
I ain’t cray-cray, I’m inappro-pro.
No offense but why do birds even have feet? Seems greedy.
When guys tweet selfies they should totally place a few hams into the background “accidentally” so women know they can afford meat
“Coward” should really mean “to move in the direction of a cow”
Give a man a fish and he will think, “what a creepy gift.”
Teach a man to fish and he will think, “My god, I have never known such boredom.”
No offense but why do birds even have feet? Seems greedy.