@English_Channel the saddest jazz hands ever
@English_Channel @English_Channel how I passively talk to my kid
“customarily, the clothes go in the hamper”
@English_Channel this is your fault for setting him up with Medusa
@English_Channel get yer dragons here! get yer dragons… I have menthol and non-menthol, get yer dragons!!
@English_Channel the time my hedgehog fell into the Chuck E. Cheese ball pit
@English_Channel I think my husband is beginning to suspect
@English_Channel no one:
my roommate at 3:26 am: hey man, did you eat the last Pop-Tart?
@English_Channel The Purge: Valentine’s Day
@English_Channel sweetie, something about you tonight is driving me wild
@English_Channel War & Peace
