@FSUSteve

Ok Brazil, this would be a time when it’s ok to bite an opponent.

@FSUSteve

I’m ok with women faking it in bed. I faked everything to get her there.

@FSUSteve

I don’t think The Proclaimers realized how far 500 miles really is.

@FSUSteve

My mom just replied to my text with “K.” Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?

@FSUSteve

Almost 10,000 tweets, guess who’s not Employee of the Month.

@FSUSteve

I’m the guy that slams on his horn in traffic and fake looks behind me to see who’s doing it.

@FSUSteve

Michelle Obama should have dropped the mic and moonwalked out.

@FSUSteve

A spider crawled across my leg while I was driving and of course that fucker survived the crash.

@FSUSteve

Little know fact but Michael Phelps was conceived anally. He’s just that good of a swimmer.

@FSUSteve

Never underestimate what a woman will do for love.