Ok Brazil, this would be a time when it’s ok to bite an opponent.
I’m ok with women faking it in bed. I faked everything to get her there.
I don’t think The Proclaimers realized how far 500 miles really is.
My mom just replied to my text with “K.” Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?
Almost 10,000 tweets, guess who’s not Employee of the Month.
I’m the guy that slams on his horn in traffic and fake looks behind me to see who’s doing it.
Michelle Obama should have dropped the mic and moonwalked out.
A spider crawled across my leg while I was driving and of course that fucker survived the crash.
Little know fact but Michael Phelps was conceived anally. He’s just that good of a swimmer.
Never underestimate what a woman will do for love.