My dad wrote me an unusually sweet and detailed text about how proud he is of me and my accomplishments and it’s so nice to see that even at his age he’s learned how to use ChatGPT
BARTENDER: how do you take it?
ME: personally
My dad said he thinks his new gf is the one and I said well technically she’s the fifth one
I asked my mom how her first date went with a guy she met on eharmony and she said “let’s just say we were physically compatible” and I said “let’s just say fine next time”
My girlfriend said Valentine’s Day is really important to her so I can’t wait to see what she has planned for us
If you don’t know what stage your relationship is in, I’d recommend not sitting in the front row of a comedy show
The Avengers greatest superpower is the ability to find a time they could all meet
Escape rooms are a fun way to discover you’re the dumbest in your friend group