The best thing about working from home is having more time to ignore the huge pile of laundry that needs doing
Me: I’m going to eat healthy from now on
Pizza: *exists*
Me: never mind
My toddler just told me I’m the best mummy ever because I “bought the good cheese for once” so I’ll be riding this high until her next tantrum
My toddler asserts dominance by demanding ice cream then just holding it till it melts and I have to clean it up
Them: hey, you coming for drinks after work?
Me:…
Me: I really want to go travelling
My bank balance: like…around the house?
You mean I spent 9 months making this small human just so she can eat all the good snacks?
There are two types of people in this world: those that eat handfuls of grated cheese straight out the bag and those that pretend they don’t
My toddler’s plan for today is to ‘throw snowballs at all the peoples’ so I’m really looking forward to picking her up from daycare later
My toddler got a certificate at nursery for ‘good listening’ and ironically she didn’t listen when I asked her if she could do that at home too
My toddler just put the parent down for a nap in her dolls house and I’m trying to figure out where she’s got this idea that parents ever sleep because it’s definitely not here
After slaving away making a full Christmas dinner, my 3yo looked lovingly at me and smiled. Then five simple words left her mouth… “can I have cereal instead?”
My daughter insisted she wanted a snowball fight in the dark so we waited till the sun set, got our torches out and ran around laughing and freezing in the garden. When I asked her if she’d had fun, she looked me in the eyes and said “no mummy, it was dark”
My most difficult parenting challenge to date is when my toddler shouted “oh my god, not again!” when my over talkative neighbour came to chat to us and I had to try not to laugh
I spend a lot of time looking at new recipes for someone who regularly burns instant noodles