@MartinPilgrim1 Books are a total scam. All of these words are already in the dictionary. They’re just selling them back to you in a different order.
@MartinPilgrim1 @MartinPilgrim1 Owls only seem clever because they’re nocturnal. All the people you’re comparing them to are drunk.
@MartinPilgrim1 A lady got off the train so I finished her crossword. Turns out she’d just gone to the toilet and now she’s back and she hates me.
@MartinPilgrim1 My top 3 assumptions when doorbell rings:
1. Murderer
2. Police telling me everyone is dead
3. That book I ordered about positive thinking