
So apparently not every chubby guy with a mustache is named Mario. My bad, dad.
So apparently not every chubby guy with a mustache is named Mario. My bad, dad.
Who wants a serious blowjob? It’s like a normal blowjob but I’ll leave my glasses on.
There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge and a note “Don’t eat me”.Now there’s an empty plate and a note “Don’t tell me what to do”
Not enough drugs in the world that would make me strip in front of a webcam. But a bottle of wine should do it.
We complain when it’s hot. We complain when it’s cold. We are such cunts. That’s why ET went home and never came back to visit.
We complain when it’s hot. We complain when it’s cold. We are such cunts. That’s why ET went home and never came back to visit.
We complain when it’s hot. We complain when it’s cold. We are such cunts. That’s why ET went home and never came back to visit.
If he says I love you and you’re not ready to say it back, just say “I know.” He’ll think you’re being cute and quoting Star Wars. Win-Win.
If he says I love you and you’re not ready to say it back, just say “I know.” He’ll think you’re being cute and quoting Star Wars. Win-Win.
I’m not hungover. I just like to wear my sunglasses when I open the fridge door. It makes me look cool.