I sent 117 texts and called you 82 times but you must be busy so I came over to tell you the restraining order expired and I still love you!
Some days I want to leave everything and just run away with him. Other days I want to own 3 baby dragons and be fireproof and naked.
Why do depressed people stay in bed? Beds were made for happy stuff like sex and naps and battles.
Laughter is like a face orgasm. If he can give me that, he earned an audition for giving me an actual orgasm.
Summer is here! You know how I know? Cause it’s kinda hot outside. And because my panties have little watermelons on them.