Life advice: If someone ever tells you “I’ll be there in thirty minutes”, you should ALWAYS respond with “You’ve got twenty” and hang up.
“Come reckon with me bro.”
-Force
Spider-Man reboots should start with the previous actor biting the new one as the origin story.
I hope when the Avengers meet Spider-Man they give him shit for not helping when NYC got attacked.
Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does the same movies over again.
Who’ll he fight? The same bad guys! Billion dollar film franchise.
Finally watching Michael Bay’s TMNT. Best part so far is a dude answering a Skype call and yelling “How did you get this number?!?”
If we weren’t able to stop Bieber Fever I seriously doubt America can stop an Ebola epidemic.
This Independence Day please remember that fireworks are not a toy, they are meant to be aimed at the nearest British ship.
I choose which country to root for in the Olympics by what cuisine I’m hungry for at the moment. Go Italy! #gnocchi2014
“Poor” is an odd word because when you put it in front of “people” it’s sad but when you put it in front of “bladder control” it’s hilarious
It’s Cyber Monday, sooo…. what are you wearing?
Butt weight. There’s more!