@SJKSalisbury

People use the term lab rat pejoratively even though there is probably no finer life than one dedicated to solving puzzles and eating cheeses.

@SJKSalisbury

Having a little nap on the sofa before taking myself up to bed for my main sleep; I call that a snors d’oeuvre.

@SJKSalisbury

Really not a fan of the wind. Why is the air in such a hurry? You’re outside already, where else are you even trying to get to?

@SJKSalisbury

Anyone that says 100kg of feathers weighs the same as 100kg of steel hasn’t considered the additional weight of having to live with knowing what you did in order to procure 100kg of feathers.

@SJKSalisbury

We’re not staying up to see in the New Year, we’re staying up to make absolutely certain that the old year is dead. Bring weapons.

@SJKSalisbury

Remembering the time my science teacher couldn’t detect my heartbeat and got angry at me as though I was deliberately withholding my pulse to bolster my goth credentials.

@SJKSalisbury

Dating as an adult is hard because even when you do meet somebody you like there are very few opportunities to engineer a situation so that you’re cast opposite one another in a school play.