@ShootyDoody

What if aliens have already visited our planet, and made contact with the most intelligent species, and it’s just not us?

@ShootyDoody

A smile lets people know you are willing and able to bite them if necessary.

@ShootyDoody

Stop calling women wild and fierce, unless they’ve bitten someone.

@ShootyDoody

God’s Wife: I just need some space!

God: (passive aggressively creates the universe)