@SoulYodeler I can see clearly now the rain has gone; I can *backs into mailbox* see all obstacles in my way *runs over squirrel* omg I love this song
@SoulYodeler @SoulYodeler Goodnight moon. Goodnight cow jumping over the moon. Goodnight space cow preventing other cows from clearing the moon. Goodnight ketamine.
@SoulYodeler The clowns I hire always seem surprised to find I’m the only party guest.
@SoulYodeler When coining nicknames, be sure it reflects how that person has impacted your life. For example, my two sons Buzzkill and Third Mortgage.
@SoulYodeler I just watched Bug’s Life and cried the whole time I mowed the lawn.
@SoulYodeler Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me, I won’t say a word about your “wenital werpes” *winks*
@SoulYodeler Walk into any flower shop and ask to see the chlamydias. That never gets old.
@SoulYodeler Concussions are like pineapples: what was the question.
@SoulYodeler HOT LOCAL SINGLES WANT TO MEET YOU SO THEIR FELONIOUS BOYFRIENDS CAN STEAL YOUR I-PHONE
@SoulYodeler Yes I am 45, male and love cats. Recently I posted a selfie. It could be worse though, right? Hello?