@TheBoydP Guys, when she complains about something you didn’t do, tell her about the things you did do. That will make everything ok!
You’re welcome!
@TheBoydP All I’m saying is if you really want someone to dance with you, you probably shouldn’t tell them to shut up.
@TheBoydP Protip: Never take your wife with you to your annual checkup. She will tell the doctor way too much about you.
@TheBoydP “Wow, this toilet is really uncomfortable…”
~Me drunk in the hot tub as my guests throw themselves out
@TheBoydP To understand the difference between Italians and Canadians all you need to know is two things. Italian sausage and Canadian bacon…
@TheBoydP You have to love a boss with a sense of humor. Mine just sent me a 7am meeting notice on Outlook and I’ve never laughed so hard…
@TheBoydP Who’s the idiot that called it “The Wizard of Oz” and not “The Flair Witch Project”?
@TheBoydP The worst kind of insomnia is snoring induced insomnia. That’s when every time you start snoring your wife shoves you awake…
@TheBoydP All I’m saying is if you don’t want me to walk into the women’s restroom put words not pictures on the doors…
@TheBoydP Four Worst Feelings Ever:
4. Losing your job
3. Romantic break up
2. Death of a loved one
1. Needing to pee when you’re stuck in traffic