@aveuaskew

Today I learned not all people are appreciative of vetriloquism. Especially my gynecologist.

@aveuaskew

The only cat like reflex I possess is turning and staring at the wall when you talk to me.

@aveuaskew

Sure I have my doubts, but Bigfoot doesn’t have any pictures of me either.

@aveuaskew

It isn’t a successful BBQ until some drunken idiot walks face first into a closed sliding glass door.

I’m fine by the way.

@aveuaskew

I’m supposed to be afraid of you because you are a twitter badass? What are you going to do, caps lock me?