@ch000ch ok i’ll bite.. what is Britain
@ch000ch @ch000ch accidentally called out my dentist’s name during my colonoscopy
@ch000ch 9-1-1 what’s ur emergency
“well i guess it’s that one of my friends changed all of my contacts’ phone numbers to 9-1-1.”
@ch000ch (reads smudged writing on hand during date) i just want to say that u look really preffy tonight
@ch000ch me: if ur soulmate dies before u meet them do u get like a backup soulmate
professor: i meant questions about the midterm
@ch000ch a fun game to play at the zoo is to walk hurriedly past a person and say “they’ve escaped. don’t run. just walk very fast.”
@ch000ch a bloodbath has got to be the least effective type of bath
@ch000ch Look at all of these beautiful horse
“Horses”
Horse is already plural
“You’re thinking of elk”
*stares off* Holy mooses, you’re right
@ch000ch ME, TEXTING MY CRUSH: have any plans tonight?
HER: no not yet!! i’m totally free and available
ME: ok well have a good night whatever u do
@ch000ch (getting murdered) please i have a Sims family