@curlycomedy I miss the days of Agatha Christie when rich people only murdered each other.
@curlycomedy @curlycomedy All of my other appliances think the air fryer is an overachiever. Even the food processor and the blender are bonding over this, and they’ve been enemies for years.
@curlycomedy Landlordle – where the goal is to get your plumbing fixed, but you only get six chances to summon a super.
P L E E Z
T O D A Y
N E E D U
S U I N G ✅
@curlycomedy I honestly think we are asking too much of cauliflower.
@curlycomedy Fitness bloggers are like, “Just fill your cabinets with healthy food.” You mean my spice museums?!
@curlycomedy White people don’t dance at concerts so they can save all their energy for the “Woo!” at the end of a song.
@curlycomedy You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.
@curlycomedy When I say, “No problem,” I mean, “YOU REMEMBER THIS FAVOR FOREVER.”
@curlycomedy I like when players of opposite teams hug after the game as if to say, “We’re all so very, very rich.”
@curlycomedy Dress for the job you want others to think you have.