
I miss the days of Agatha Christie when rich people only murdered each other.
I miss the days of Agatha Christie when rich people only murdered each other.
All of my other appliances think the air fryer is an overachiever. Even the food processor and the blender are bonding over this, and they’ve been enemies for years.
Landlordle – where the goal is to get your plumbing fixed, but you only get six chances to summon a super.
P L E E Z
T O D A Y
N E E D U
S U I N G ✅
I honestly think we are asking too much of cauliflower.
Fitness bloggers are like, “Just fill your cabinets with healthy food.” You mean my spice museums?!
White people don’t dance at concerts so they can save all their energy for the “Woo!” at the end of a song.
You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.
When I say, “No problem,” I mean, “YOU REMEMBER THIS FAVOR FOREVER.”
I like when players of opposite teams hug after the game as if to say, “We’re all so very, very rich.”
Dress for the job you want others to think you have.