@dadmann_walking

having a teenager is fun because food that was in the kitchen when I went to bed is no longer there when I wake up.

@dadmann_walking

if your day doesn’t start with chasing your neighbors chickens out of your yard are you even living your best life?

@dadmann_walking

there are smart kids. Then there are my kids heating popsicles up in the microwave.

@dadmann_walking

my kids can lose something i bought them for $20 and up and not even flinch but could lose a stick they found in the yard and cry about it for hours.

@dadmann_walking

I saw a banner by a local restaurant that told the community thanks for 30 great years and my mind thought “oh so since like 1960s they’ve been open” then I finished reading the banner “Since 1992”. well shit.

@dadmann_walking

12 called me when he was out last week. i answered and he seriously goes “hi. this is seth. your son”. does he already think i have dementia? or worse..DO I AND I DON’T KNOW IT?

@dadmann_walking

me: they recommend to relieve stress to walk away from your desk to take a walk

boss: ok but you’ve been gone for 4 days

@dadmann_walking

[out in public]

12: did you know if you stick out your tongue and bite down on it you can’t breathe thru your nose?

me: [showing him he’s wrong]

12: now you look like an idiot

me: i hate kids man.