@dadmann_walking having a teenager is fun because food that was in the kitchen when I went to bed is no longer there when I wake up.
@dadmann_walking @dadmann_walking if your day doesn’t start with chasing your neighbors chickens out of your yard are you even living your best life?
@dadmann_walking there are smart kids. Then there are my kids heating popsicles up in the microwave.
@dadmann_walking my kids can lose something i bought them for $20 and up and not even flinch but could lose a stick they found in the yard and cry about it for hours.
@dadmann_walking Hell hath no fury like a toddler just waking up from a nap.
@dadmann_walking I saw a banner by a local restaurant that told the community thanks for 30 great years and my mind thought “oh so since like 1960s they’ve been open” then I finished reading the banner “Since 1992”. well shit.
@dadmann_walking 12 called me when he was out last week. i answered and he seriously goes “hi. this is seth. your son”. does he already think i have dementia? or worse..DO I AND I DON’T KNOW IT?
@dadmann_walking clean window: [exists]
toddlers: what’s that taste like
@dadmann_walking me: they recommend to relieve stress to walk away from your desk to take a walk
boss: ok but you’ve been gone for 4 days
@dadmann_walking [out in public]
12: did you know if you stick out your tongue and bite down on it you can’t breathe thru your nose?
me: [showing him he’s wrong]
12: now you look like an idiot
me: i hate kids man.