@ericbove

I just paid off a credit card debt with a different credit card & now I get why people rob banks.

@ericbove

The people naming dinosaurs should teach the people naming hurricanes how to name stuff.

@ericbove

Sent out a mass text invite to my pity party & Autocorrect turned it into a pita party. Now I’m eating hummus with people I don’t even like.

@ericbove

From now on when skinny girls say they’re fat I’m just gonna be like, “Yup” & walk away.