@funnyordie

TRUMP: I don’t have a subpoena. I have a very huge poena.

@funnyordie

Martin Shkreli can look forward to a 5,000% markup on cigarettes in his near future.

@funnyordie

BRAZIL: Can you describe your attacker?

RYAN LOCHTE: You wouldn’t know him. He goes to another Olympics.

#LochteGate

@funnyordie

Usain Bolt has the greatest Tinder profile picture of all time on his hands.

@funnyordie

Shouts out to the Trump Tower suction cup guy for being the second craziest person to ascend that building.