@handsforkeys I’ll take your LEAST sexual soup.
@handsforkeys @handsforkeys You’ve restored my faith in humanitNOPE THERE IT GOES AGAIN
@handsforkeys Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone(Absence of special lady creates cataclysmic world ending event)
@handsforkeys Why isn’t there ghost dinosaurs? They didn’t all finish their business. They didn’t know the comet was coming.
@handsforkeys It seems unrealistic that no two people in a movie almost ever have the same name. My screenplay, 12 Guys Named Mike, will address this.
@handsforkeys Draw attention to your older tweets by being arrested on suspicion of multiple murders.
@handsforkeys As a fan of Dirty Dancing I can only hope that when we go on holiday one of my daughters sleeps with a middle aged dance instructor.
@handsforkeys My phone case doesn’t expose the logo on the back. So it could be anything. I could be speaking on two mirrors with foam in the middle.
@handsforkeys Avenge me but only if it’s convenient.
@handsforkeys Sheryl Crow: This ain’t no disco. This ain’t no country club either.
Sheryl Crow – The world’s worst archaeologist.