@mayamanion

I’ve been listening to the official workout station on Pandora for 3 months and I’m still fat, I’m calling bullshit.

@mayamanion

Who needs whips and chains? Christian should have had Ana read Fifty Shades of Grey if he wanted to torture her.

@mayamanion

Ok parents who have really clean houses, do you have outdoor pets and outdoor kids? How does this work?

@mayamanion

In my son’s class they were talking about allergies, my son said “My mom says she’s allergic to most other moms” Super

@mayamanion

The whole “bad boy” thing is fun until you have kids with him. Ooh you drank away the diaper money? That’s soooo hot

@mayamanion

My 42 yr old friend is dating a 24 yo guy, she caught him cheating so she took away his play station for a week