My whole life was a lie.
Stop sending me this shit.
Livid.
Americans: “Beans on toast? Gross.”
Also Americans:
Never forget.
This tweet lives in my head rent free.
Vegetables: “We need to be stored in special conditions with ideal humidity and temperature.”
Potatoes:
Drunk at 20: “I’m going to call my ex.”
Drunk at 30: “I’m going to tweet my MP.”
“Microsoft Word? I haven’t heard that name in years…”
Looks like someone’s thrown Yoda through a window.
Never forget.
