
I just made bacon for dessert, I’m not in the mood to be trifled with
I just made bacon for dessert, I’m not in the mood to be trifled with
I wish I were better at subtweets cause I have some really passive aggressive things I’ld like to say to a couple of you
Of course I’ll buy a harmonica for a 3 year old. He doesn’t live with me
I should start carrying a pool noodle in my car and randomly smack cars when stuck in traffic
I hate when someone sneaks up in front of you when you’re scrolling on your phone
Don’t sell yourself short, in fact, don’t sell yourself at all. I’m pretty sure it’s illegal
Walking around naked is a great motivator to get back to the gym
I’m texting hubs a grocery list one item at a time so he can experience his phone blowing up