@sonictyrant A Vampire Bat is easy to spot due to its funny accent and little silk cape
@sonictyrant Just Once i’d like to see a Shark wearing a People Tooth Necklace
@sonictyrant me: can we discuss my crippling fear of elephants?
therapist: i’m all ears
me: *screaming*
@sonictyrant A Pringles Tube but for Donuts
@sonictyrant Barney: [skipping pebbles across the lake]
Fred: MY DAUGHTER!
@sonictyrant Me: i’m just here for shits and giggles
Taco Bell employee: *passes me my order* i can’t promise you the giggles
@sonictyrant Flex on the Average Person by eating 9 Spiders a Year
@sonictyrant Waiter: May I recommend the steak?
Dracula: You may not
@sonictyrant Miss Piggy’s karate skills are my favorite pork chops.
@sonictyrant Granola Bars, for when you’re hungry & also want to teach your mouth a lesson