restaurant hosts will be like “let’s sit them at table 26Bq105” and then a server will just be like “ok follow me”
You Might Also Like
Date : So you’re the youngest of three?
Me : Yep, my parents are both older.
My mom used to beat me with a camera.
I still get flashbacks.
Ironically I’m watching an exercise infomercial because I’m too lazy to get the remote.
I sexually identify as a hand grenade
I have been using teeth whitener, and now they are completely oblivious to the experiences and sufferings of other peoples.
H: Is there anything new you want to try in bed?
*stretches out alone in bed, sleeps for 8 hours*
M: That was amazing.
I never claimed to have all the answers. I said two. I have two answers. There’s a guy in Nebraska who has six. Go bother him.
If by “interests” you mean vices, then sure, I have several outside interests.
If I’m found dead in the bathtub clutching a toaster, check for Pop-Tarts before jumping to conclusions.