Where it all went wrong

Me: Oh I love your hair, you look like a different person.

Her: Is that what you want?

You Might Also Like


I could’ve been a doctor. OK, so I don’t have the intelligence or the people skills, but I nailed the shitty handwriting.


We’re out of duct tape, craft glue, and frozen orange juice because I made a sandwich while I was drunk last night.


Halloween ’94: Mom says store sold out of Batman costumes and buys me a Catwoman one. Called me Catman. The worst part: she went as Batman?


Found out today my ex girlfriend married a successful businessman. I’m probably better off without her, seems like she has ambition and standards


How much is appropriate to tip the police officer who opens the squad car door for you?


Black rotten roses & run over kittens
Teeth falling out & a test is unwritten
Naked in public becoming a meme


When my in-laws kindly told me to treat them as if they were my own family I graciously obliged.

I don’t speak to my own family either.


❤Missed connection❤

You were the street magician who pointed at me and asked me to shout out the name of a card

I was the guy in the red shirt who panicked and shouted out “PIKACHU” whilst you rolled your eyes